CRIME PAYS
Kenny Merchant – that wasn’t his real name, but then, little was real about Kenny – had selected Harrods on a quiet Monday morning as the venue for the first part of the operation. Kenny was dressed in a pinstriped suit, white shirt, and Guards tie. Few of the shop’s customers would have realized it was a Guards tie, but he was confident that the assistant he had selected to serve him would recognize the crimson and dark-blue stripes immediately. The door was held open for him by a commissionaire who had served in the Coldstream Guards, and who on spotting the tie immediately saluted him. The same commissionaire had not saluted him on any of his several visits during the previous week, but to be fair, Kenny had been dressed then in a shiny, well-worn suit, open-necked shirt, and dark glasses. But last week had only been for reconnaissance; today he planned to be arrested.
Although Harrods has over a hundred thousand customers a week, the quietest period is always between ten and eleven on a Monday morning. Kenny knew every detail about the great store, in the way a football fan knows all the statistics of his favorite team.
He knew where all the CCTV cameras were placed, and could recognize any of the security guards at thirty paces. He even knew the name of the assistant who would be serving him that morning, although Mr. Parker had no idea that he had been selected as a tiny cog in Kenny’s well-oiled machine.
When Kenny appeared at the jewelry department that morning, Mr. Parker was briefing a young assistant on the changes he required to the shelf display. ‘Good morning, sir,’ he said, turning to face his first customer of the day. ‘How can I help you?
’ ‘I was looking for a pair of cufflinks,’ Kenny said, in the clipped tones he hoped made him sound like a Guards officer.
‘Yes, of course, sir,’ said Mr. Parker.
It amused Kenny to see the differential
the treatment he received as a result of the Guards tie, which he had been able to purchase in the men’s department the previous day for an outlay of £ 23.
‘Any particular style?’ asked the sales assistant.
‘I’d prefer silver.’ ‘Of course, sir,’ said Mr. Parker, who proceeded to place on the counter several boxes of silver cufflinks. Kenny already knew the pair he wanted, as he had picked them out the previous Saturday afternoon.
‘What about those?’ he asked, pointing to the top shelf. As the sales assistant turned away, Kenny checked the TV surveillance camera and took a pace to his right, to be sure that they could see him more clearly. While Mr. Parker reached up to remove the cufflinks, Kenny slid the chosen pair off the counter and slipped them into his jacket pocket before the assistant turned back round.
Out of the corner of his eye, Kenny saw a security guard moving swiftly towards him, while at the same time speaking into his walkie-talkie
. ‘Excuse me, sir,’ said the guard, touching his elbow. ‘I wonder if you would be kind enough to accompany me.
’ ‘What’s this all about?’ demanded Kenny, trying to sound annoyed, as a second security guard appeared on his other side. ‘Perhaps it might be wise if you were to accompany us so that we can discuss the matter privately,’ suggested the second guard, holding onto his arm a little more firmly. ‘I’ve never been so insulted in my life,’ said Kenny, now speaking at the top of his voice. He took the cufflinks out of his pocket, replaced them on the counter and added, ‘I had every intention of paying for them.
’ The guard picked up the box. To his surprise, the irate customer then accompanied him to the interview room without uttering another word.
On entering the little green-walled room, Kenny was asked to take a seat on the far side of a desk. One guard returned to his duties on the ground floor while the other remained by the door. Kenny knew that on an average day, forty-two people were arrested for shoplifting at Harrods, and over 90 percent of them were prosecuted.
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